Loveteacher – Secrets of the Sexual Surrogate

Loveteacher – Secrets of the Sexual Surrogate

Shyness can make you feel miserable the 40-Fern Arden can look professional but it is hard to imagine it. the As he talks about being a virgin at this age, he smiles.

“Don’t worry,” the Manhattan sex therapist tells he. “We can work on this.”

If the doctor’s voice sounds confident, it’s with good reason. Arden is the Founding founder of Central Park West’s private clinic offers a very special type of care. of Treatment for psychosexual problems such as this.

She has an all-star team.-Female staff of Sex surrogates, also known as “surrogate partners,” Who gives clients one?-On-One coaching in caring techniques, kissing and feeling relaxed with another person the nude and, inevitably, the The act of sex itself.

“The focus is not sex, but familiarity and intimacy,” Arden insists, who was the founder the 22 years ago, Abel2 Counseling Center. “We provide an environment, not for sexual pleasure, but for sexual learning.”

Get your instant download Loveteacher – Secrets of the Sexual Surrogate

The licensed sexologist never spoke about her practice. the She says that media were used before because they are more effective. “I have famous clients.” But she agreed to talk to The Post following Friday’s release of the independent movie “The Sessions,” This is already creating Oscar buzz.

It says the Real-Life story of A California sex substitute who accepts a man with a severe disability and wants to have sex before his death.

“People tend to be ill-informed about what a surrogate partner does,” Arden, who is hopeful, explains. the Award-A winning film the late polio sufferer Mark O’Brien and his surrogate, Cheryl Cohen Greene, will shine a much-You need to be able to see the details the profession.

“They think of it pejoratively, the same as a sex worker, but it’s not,” She adds. “Just as you have legitimate massage therapists and people who run massage parlors, there is a huge difference between them.”

In 1973, however, a group of people was formed. of Los Angeles-based sex surrogates tried to get their profession recognized. Today the International Professional Surrogates Association has around 30 surrogates who are registered the US, though Arden’s staff are not members. Per the organization’s code of Ethics: Surrogates must complete a two-hour ethics course.-Training program for a week with the Society and work under the Surveillance (but no observation) of A licensed sex therapist.

However, one expert in law says that the It is still illegal to conduct business.

Derrelle Janey, a defense attorney at the Manhattan law firm Gottleib and Gordon makes likens the sex surrogacy practice to prostitution — after all, money is being received for sex: “It doesn’t matter if the client is disabled, it doesn’t matter if he is suffering from some kind of emotional distress — that just makes it kind of sad. They have agreed to pay money for a sexual experience, and everyone understands that’s the transaction. In my view, that’s prostitution.”

Why has Arden been able her business to run so well for so many years without losing sight of the end goal? of the Janey speaks out for law “Maybe this kind of thing has not been a priority of the district attorney.”

Arden has a Ph.D. the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality, insists what she does is not prostitution; it’s a public service. Scrolling through her Web site, however, you’d be forgiven for thinking otherwise. One page lists a few of women by age, height and weight details — most of They look so young and slimming like a dream. “Debbie: 29 years old; 5-foot-2; 100 lbs.” Arden also mentions their intelligence and personalities. “They are sincere, patient and caring,” Arden writes on the site and adding that her surrogates “will have college degrees.”

Just like the Helen Hunt portrays Helen Hunt’s character in “The Sessions,” the three surrogate partners currently on Arden’s staff are “professionally trained clinicians” She will ask them to report back after each session.

“You would typically need a partner to resolve most sexual problems and for single men that is obviously an issue,” Arden charges between $3,000 to $5,000 per course for average clients of Each session can last between 12 and 15 minutes. the surrogate.

Arden doesn’t watch the sessions as they take place in her offices. the Interaction between the For the client the surrogate. Instead, she gets a complete report of the From the surrogate and follow-up with the men afterward.

“Most of the men who come to my center are sexually inexperienced, so the surrogate program allows them to progress with their treatment.”

She believes it would be “cruel” Not to give them treatment and not to have them “remain dysfunctional” Until they find a companion to take them to therapy.

“People have this perception of a sex surrogate as: ‘Oh wow, I am going to have a sexual teacher and we’re going to have hot sex!’ but it’s not that way at all,” Arden insists on testing her surrogates and clients for STDs every two months.

Download it immediately Loveteacher – Secrets of the Sexual Surrogate

“The sessions with the Surrogates develop slowly. It’s a very gradual, sensual process of Getting used to holding hands, kissing, and caressing.

“[The clients] could come into treatment for several visits before they even take their clothes off.”

Sarah, one of Arden’s surrogate partners — who agreed to speak to The Post on condition of anonymity and declined to give her age — carefully fielded questions about the Practical side of Her job.

“I usually begin sessions by working on eye contact and the way they hold their bodies,” She explained that her background was in social work and sexual psychology. “We use massage and touch therapy, so the A client can learn to become in the Be present with your body and be aware. of the sensations.

“We take a mind-and-body approach and slowly remove anxiety out of the equation.”

Asked whether she ever has penetrative sex with clients, she won’t comment.

She is also very discreet in her private life.

“I don’t feel compelled to tell everybody that I meet [that I work as a sexual surrogate],” She says. “There are certain people in my life who understand what I do and are very supportive of it.

“But there are also people in my life who there is no reason for me to even go there.”

By contrast, Greene, 68, whose notes about her work with polio victim O’Brien were used as part of the Screenplay “The Sessions,” She is more than happy to be publicly revealed.

Her memoir “An Intimate Life: Sex, Love and My Journey as a Surrogate Partner” She enthusiastically endorses the publication, which will be released next month. the movie. It depicts the period when she was 42 and O’Brien was a 36-Year-Berkeley graduate student who hired her to help him get his virginity back. Despite being the most active person in her life, she is still very happy. of His life was saved by an iron lung. He continued to have sex with other men until he passed away at 49.

“I first saw it in January at the Sundance Film Festival and, like everyone else, I laughed, I cried,” Greene lives in Berkeley, Calif. He has been a a “surrogate-partner therapist” For more than 30 year. “It captures the love and trust which sexual surrogacy is really all about.”

Greene estimates that she earns approximately $50,000 annually and has a client base of about 125. of Men 40 years and older. Recently, 92-year-old customer was killed. Ten percent of Many of her clients were virgins who fell in love with academia and their careers. “They’re like ‘Oh my God, I don’t want to come across as inexperienced,’ ” Greene says of Her patients. “They finally say, ‘Life is too short. I’ve got to go into surrogate therapy.’ ”

Greene is married to a “wonderful, supportive partner,” Two-person charge $300-One hour session of sex and the penetrative sex usually takes place on the sixth visit. She’s clearly satisfied in the job.

“I look at our work like this: If you go to a prostitute, it’s like going to a restaurant. You can read the You choose the menu, they prepare it and they hope you enjoy it.

Get your instant download Loveteacher – Secrets of the Sexual Surrogate

“With a surrogate, it’s like going to cooking school,” She continues. “You get the ingredients, you learn to make a meal together — and then the point is to go out into the world and share that and not come back.”