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You don’t need to smoke peace pipes while overlooking the horizon on a moss-covered bluff and hoisting your pages up into the sunlight.
The Creative Writing Class 2023 – Meat & Hair (Ash Ambirge)
If this is you, wave your pen in the air like you just don’t care
We’ll ignore the fact that that pen looks like a squid imitating a microphone— let’s see if this sounds like you!
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You write content on the internet like newsletters, blog posts, essays, articles, courses, lead magnets, sales pages, books, socials, and sometimes inadvertent passive aggressive emails to clients—AND ALSO…
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You’re fun in real life (you swear!) but you can never seem to get it on the page. Everything you write ends up sounding a liiiiiitle bit like a term paper. (Okay, fine, a lot.) You read your stuff back to yourself and basically want to just walk straight into the ocean.
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Worse, you end up sounding way more salesy & “bro marketing” than you intend: everything feels forced, you worry you sound too pushy, it’s all a bit generic, trite, and cliché sounding, and the whole entire process is exhausting and time-consuming…you’re starting to dread “content creation.
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And honestly? Most of the time you feel like you’re spitting into the wind. ? You’re working so damn hard to “create content” but nobody seems to care / notice / open your Magna Carta masterpieces. Is it your subject lines? Your writing voice? That one time you said the F-word? (And then heard from 50 people who were offended…)
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Big, sparkly bonus points if you’re also: (a) a non-native speaker of English; (b) A scientist or academic surrounded by other scientists and academics; (c) A corporate professional for whom internet writing is now foreign because you’ve been ruinnnneeeed!; (d) Stacey’s mom. We’ve been waiting to meet you since 2003.
Writing content people LOVE doesn’t have to feel like a thousand needles in the eye. (Even if you’re an accountant from Philadelphia.)
Just kidding, I love accountants from Philadelphia. ***takes bite out of cheesesteak**
The good news is: writing online doesn’t have to be such a slog. It can be fun again!
And you don’t need to be “a creative person” by nature, or even someone named “Caspian.”
You don’t need to smoke peace pipes while overlooking the horizon on a moss-covered bluff and hoisting your pages up into the sunlight.
And you certainly don’t need to spend endless hours procrastinating and torturing yourself into believing that you left your spark on pool table that one summer in Georgia.
Rather, it’s about learning how to write with pleasure, so the people reading can experience pleasure.
Pleasure is the key to selling.
Most people think it’s about “getting found.” But, consider for a moment this pickle of a truth:
The internet’s a big place.
People ARE finding you.
The real problem?
~ They don’t care. ~
(Yet!)
Fun fact: 67% of the people that were about to give you money, don’t.
Whether you’re selling web design, coaching, photography, a workshop, a dynamite Etsy creation, a book, a physical product, a 499 page PDF, or your grandmother’s pearls (tsk!), online cart abandonment rates tell us you’re actually losing a lot of money.
67% is nearly 7 out of 10 people.
So let’s say you charge $1,000 for a service you offer.
That means that for every $3,000 you do make, you let another $7,000 skate right out the door.
Seven thousand dollars is a lot of money to be letting slip right through your fingers. You could have HAD that money. You did the work. They did find you. They did see you. Hell, their finger might have been ON THE BUY / CONTACT / YES! BUTTON, but then they made the fatal decision to say “no.”
This proves one thing:
You don’t need to market yourself.
You need to magnetize yourself.
And that’s what Creative Writing School is all about.
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Course Features
- Lectures 0
- Quizzes 0
- Duration 10 weeks
- Skill level All levels
- Language English
- Students 52
- Assessments Yes